Michael B. Gustavson (![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} bonjour_benoit) wrote,@ 2008-07-22 22:13:00 |
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Michel's First Love
Michel didn't learn the concept of "personal boundaries" until well into his teens. His parents, while alive, encouraged affection, and the nuns were indulgent of his need to touch and be touched. He was free with his love and affection, sharing with anyone and everyone that passed through the convent.
Michel didn't learn the difference between chaste love and romantic love until he met Émile, a charismatic child of the streets, when he was 17. Émile came to the convent for a free meal one night and didn't leave. Michel was infatuated because Émile was the first boy to not initially balk at Michel's open affection. Émile was infatuated because he was. They were inseparable for months. It took exactly 8 days for them to kiss for the first time, and another 5 after that before they were taking turns exploring one another in the hidden basements rooms that Michel found as a child and the back rooms of bars that Émile navigated like a pro.
Émile came to the theater with Michel when he came of age and came home. He stayed for a year. He acted in a single show, a breathtaking and heartbreaking performance in Hamlet. The day after the show finished it's run, Michel woke up to an empty bed, and a note on the pillow.
Je vous manquerai, mon aimé. I will miss you, my beloved.
Michel has not seen him since.
He has loved since - Anaïs, Sébastien, Hélène - but none quite as deeply, nor as well. Michel catches his mind wandering to him every once in a great while - where is he, what is he doing, is he safe, did he escape the city - but he catches himself, shakes his mind free of it, and continues on.
Michel didn't learn the concept of "personal boundaries" until well into his teens. His parents, while alive, encouraged affection, and the nuns were indulgent of his need to touch and be touched. He was free with his love and affection, sharing with anyone and everyone that passed through the convent.
Michel didn't learn the difference between chaste love and romantic love until he met Émile, a charismatic child of the streets, when he was 17. Émile came to the convent for a free meal one night and didn't leave. Michel was infatuated because Émile was the first boy to not initially balk at Michel's open affection. Émile was infatuated because he was. They were inseparable for months. It took exactly 8 days for them to kiss for the first time, and another 5 after that before they were taking turns exploring one another in the hidden basements rooms that Michel found as a child and the back rooms of bars that Émile navigated like a pro.
Émile came to the theater with Michel when he came of age and came home. He stayed for a year. He acted in a single show, a breathtaking and heartbreaking performance in Hamlet. The day after the show finished it's run, Michel woke up to an empty bed, and a note on the pillow.
Je vous manquerai, mon aimé. I will miss you, my beloved.
Michel has not seen him since.
He has loved since - Anaïs, Sébastien, Hélène - but none quite as deeply, nor as well. Michel catches his mind wandering to him every once in a great while - where is he, what is he doing, is he safe, did he escape the city - but he catches himself, shakes his mind free of it, and continues on.